Evolution? Really?

Evolution? Really?

 by Mehul Williams

Evolution Article

We can find a lot of literature in our world, from moody haiku to satirical classics. Out of the many genres, a very popular and amusing one is the fairytale! Who doesn’t like to enjoy a good reading of Rumpelstiltskin or The Princess and the Pea? There is however, one specific fairytale that is so impossible, that it’s readers’ minds may have been adversely affected by it!
This is the greatly popular Evolution. Evolution is seen by many as fact, and not as the impossible fairytale that it is. It has so many fallacies, delusions, and errors; yet its followers still fight to prove it. As said by prominent evolutionist Eugenie Scott, “There are no weaknesses in the theory of evolution.” But she forgot something; she forgot reality. She forgot the undisputed laws of nature. Considering her sensational level of thinking, she probably forgot to have breakfast too. Scholars could debate on the topic of evolution until eternity (or until they evolved, based on their respective beliefs). Of the many proofs against evolution, this short study will only focus on three.

First things first, humans display no advantage as the “highest form of evolution.” Also, note that compared to other species, we are technically devolving. Natural selection calls for the greater kind to overpower and flourish over the other. What do humans have?! Or maybe we lost our advantages! Oh! If only I had the grasping toes of my great-great-great-great-(many greats later)-great-great grandfather. But I lost them because natural selection wanted me too! I probably had wings too(I shed a few tears right here). Also, if we should be evolving, why am I missing a tail? I wish evolution let me keep my tail; then I could hold my bag of chips while drinking my soda while selecting a YouTube video all at the same time. But seriously, we have no advantage to prove natural selection. Most of us can’t even jump higher than 2 feet.
Somewhere along the line, we lost a couple thousand eyes. And can someone please give me back my gills? I don’t see how losing gills could possibly be evolving!

Secondly, there are absolutely no fossils to even remotely prove evolution. In fact, the fossil record disproves evolution. There should be millions upon millions of intermediates to record  the species transitioning. no-evolutionWe can’t even find one. Not even one! Where did they go? Did all the fossils sit up one morning and decide to disappear? Maybe they all got on a spaceship and went to Mars? It is also possible that an extinct cyclops monkey ate them all. At this point, I would like to point out the possibility that these transitions can’t be found because they don’t exist!

Lastly, the law of entropy laughs at every single argument that evolution has to offer. Entropy is very real and very proved. Try it. Throw your phone at the window as hard as you can. Now count the pieces, and please don’t cut yourself (10 million disorganized pieces of glass are very sharp) Oh, and did I mention how disorganized the pieces are! I would like to add that the pieces of glass are now very disorganized. And I don’t think your phone is too happy either. Don’t even try putting it’s screen back together, it’s gone(very gone). I think what you need, is a brand new iPhone. And let me tell you, that brand new iPhone is gonna be dirty if you don’t clean it. And just keep in mind, that cloth that you’re using to clean it is going wear out soon. Hold on, do I hear something? Oh is that someone yelling “Entropy?” Yes! And also, notice that the sound waves diminished as they got closer. Hey reader, guess what? Say hello to entropy, the destroyer of all. If our earth were in fact 4.543 billion years old(I had to Google that), our beloved earth would be nothing more than intergalactic space dust. Even the sun would be space dust. Even space would be space dust. And after so many years, even that space dust would become space dust.

 

Evolution really is hilarious. Darwin himself said it’s impossible. If animals could laugh, I’m sure they would laugh at evolution! If you are an evolutionist, I know you want to tell me, “there are no proofs for creation outside of the Bible.” Fine, I won’t argue with you on that. But please do note, there are no disproofs for creation either. Evolution, however, has no proofs and   many disproofs. Don’t disagree with me, I just gave you three! Open your eyes to reality, and enjoy your breakfast. Saying that evolution is true is just as bad as calling the world flat. hmm.



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